Nudity is our ally.

Hi. My name is Jennifer and I am addicted to clutter. I can't remember when I didn't have clutter in my life. I have tried living without clutter before, and I remember being very uncomfortable. I am surrounded by clutter. I have moved boxes from Wisconsin to NH, and back to WI 5 yrs later. Never unpacked, but oh so valuable. These same boxes are still not unpacked. 3 years later. I am addicted to clutter. For a long time I blamed my clutter on other people. I told myself that it wasn't my fault, people kept giving us stuff. I told myself that I needed these things, just in case. I told myself it wouldn't be nice to get rid of things that people had given to me. I told myself that some things I had spent good money on, and it would be throwing money away to donate it. I am addicted to clutter. There. I admitted it. I feel a little better, but am now wondering how I am going to live without my clutter.

Nudity is our ally. I've decided that a nudist colony is not such a bad idea. You don't have to do laundry. Perhaps I will move to the desert, you don't need seasonal clothes there. Seriously though, I have been running the washer all weekend. The laundry will never be done. I MUST start putting things into the Goodwill bag. I MUST start culling the mountain. I have seven large containers (i.e. large laundry baskets, rubbermaid totes, etc.) sitting in the playroom heaped with various sizes of clothing. That doesn't include my closet. Or towels and linens. Or the couch out in the shed piled HIGH with clothes. These are just the clothes that we wear, or were stored in the boys room. I have to get started on this stuff and I don't want to. My head is going to hurt at the end of the day and my kids, as young as they are, are going to complain. My daughter cannot part with any of her 10 sets of pajamas. Even the 3 or 4 that don't fit. I know it to be necessary to cut down on daily chores and time wasters. There is no real reason to have so many clothes. We can only wear one set of clothes at a time. I have the hardest time sending them to Goodwill though. When am I going to grasp the concept? I have gotten so many good deals on good clothes there, but what is keeping me from sharing my abundance??? Why can't I do this? I can. And I must.

Yesterday on the way home from visiting my husband's parents, we took a little ride past the piece of land that I want to live on. It's not for sale. It's in the middle of nowhere. It is on top of a hill that overlooks a beautiful valley. This is where I want to live. I want a nice long driveway and an efficient home. I want a garden and a dog for my kids. With every bag I bring to donate, I feel like I am getting closer to that piece of land. To that house. The dream and obsession of living there is what is motivating me. Is this right? How disappointed am I going to be if I don't end up being able to live there? There is no where else I want to go. I have driven the county looking for a piece of land in a good proximity to civilization, with a great view, and wide open spaces for my kids to grow. That is my dream. That is the house I want to live in.

Although this is my ultimate dream, I believe that it is not going to happen. I know that I am being prepared for something else. I don't know if it is somethig better than what I have (I can't see how, I feel very blessed with the life I have) or if it is some unmentionable hardship where I will need to dig deep for strength and will have no energy for excess in my life. Oh the drama. Perhaps nothing at all will happen. That is how life really goes.

Today's challenge is to get through the laundry. I'm running on low batteries because the baby isn't sleeping, but all I have to do today is get through the kids wardrobes. If I do nothing else, I will be a happy woman. Minimize! Minimize! Minimize! And you will have the prize!