Moving....again.

Well, here we go again. We sold our house in Wisconsin and found a new one here. Now it is time to pack up, again, and move to our permanent residence. I have 2 weeks. The last week I have been fencing sitting about a lot of things. First off is the New Year's Resolution to loose weight. I think I am the only woman alive who is breastfeeding, chasing 4 kids and can STILL gain weight. All I can come up with is that I am not sleeping much, and it is wreaking havoc on my hormones, triggering the weight gain. And why am I not sleeping? That, my dear friends is the question of the century. I used to not be able to function without my 8 hours of sleep. Now I"m like the energizer bunny. It doesn't matter how much sleep I don't get, I just keep going and going and going. So I guess sleep took a back burner in priorities. What's keeping me up? I dunno. Because the computer died for a good 10 solid days and I STILL was not going to bed at a decent hour. And then once I am asleep, without fail, at least two kids will wake me up for something. Bloody noses, night terrors, bad dreams, super soaked pull-up. You name it! They all wake me up....except the baby. Go figure! The baby is the best sleeper of them all.

Another thing weighing on my mind is my book. I'm writing a book, but I'm not sure I want to continue it. Why? My wonderful sister attempted reading it on the blog, and told me "It's not bad. You're no Hemingway, but it's not bad." Now, this shouldn't bother me, and it doesn't really. She is very well read, and I value her opinion, which is why I asked her to begin with. And I know for myself that it is indeed, no Hemingway. It is consumeristic crap. I am an attention whore. I am writing that book with two simple goals: Make money and be famous. I feel rather shallow for doing it with that purpose. I know I am capable of writing something meaningful and enlightening, but I choose a plot and theme that is marketable. Sellable. Lucrative.

It bothers me to think I just might be as shallow and selfish as people have accused me of for years.